Dreams of a Friend
by onlytomriddle
Summary: MWPP era, eventual RLSB, prePrank There is no secret that dreams won't tell. And Remus has a big secret. None of these characters is mine.
1. Prologue

**Author's Note:** This was originally going to be a flashback in a chapter fic, but instead of waiting for inspiration to write the rest of it, I figured it would be just fine as a oneshot. If you think there should be more, tell me so, but I can't make any promises... Apologies in advance for the mildness of the slash; I've never written romance before. Please enjoy anywayz!

CHUG

"Oi, Moony! Come join the fun!" called Prongs, who was the first to enter the Common Room after a trip to Hogsmeade. Moony looked up from Mysteries of the Kappa. He was sitting in his favorite faded scarlet armchair with one leg resting across the other knee, elbow jutting into the armrest. The wrist holding up his book had been getting rather tired. When he looked up he saw the rest of the Marauders coming in carrying two bottles each of some bright orange liquid that sparked inside the bottle each time it was shaken.

"How'd you get that firewhiskey?" Moony asked.

Prongs just beamed and let Padfoot answer.

"How do you think?"

Moony and Padfoot locked eyes for a few seconds. He ought to have reported them. He ought to have snatched the bottles, scolded his friends, and then turned in the evidence to McGonagall. Of course he didn't. He was far too tired to consider it. He hadn't even gone to Hogsmeade that day because he was still tired and ill from a few nights before.

"I suppose you're going to have a party?" Moony took off his reading glasses with one hand and folded them.

"You could say that," answered Padfoot, smirking. Then Wormtail spoke up.

"Remember the last time we convinced you to drink? We had such a great time—"

Moony sighed and interrupted. "I'm not doing that again. You can have your fun. I'm going to bed." Ignoring the protests from his friends, he placed a bookmark in his spot in the book and closed it. Then he stood up and approached the stairs that led up to the boys' dorm.

Padfoot rushed over and blocked the entrance to the stairs. "Come on, Moony, old mate, it'll be loads of fun. Just like last time. You didn't get to have much fun today." Moony kept walking, and attempted to push him aside.

"I'm sorry. I just don't want to."

"Are you sure?" Padfoot stopped smirking. Their faces were inches apart. Moony, suddenly uncomfortable, ducked below Padfoot's arm and went up the stairs.

"I'm sure," he muttered.

The last time he had alcohol had been fun, to be sure, aside from the hangover he had suffered afterwards. He had laughed and babbled and stumbled around in such an uncharacteristic way as to be almost a relief. It was the babbling he didn't like, though. He had too much to hide to ever get drunk again, especially in certain company.

He changed his clothes and settled into his bed. It was the one closest to the door, on the right-hand side coming in. Warm in his red plaid flannel pyjamas, he and his nervous imagination quickly settled, and he was able to fall asleep. No secrets would be revealed tonight.

…"Remus…you know I've always loved you." They were in the library, standing next to one of the study tables. "I love you too, Sirius." They hugged for a long time, happily melting into each other. He savored the scent of Sirius's hair, which hadn't been put up in its usual ponytail. Then, just as Remus was starting to forget where he was, Sirius pulled back a bit and stared into his eyes. When Remus did nothing, Sirius put his face very close to that of Remus. Their eyes blurred together, and he gave Remus a gentle kiss on the lips. The very air around them was filled with happiness as everything faded away…

Moony groaned a bit and rolled onto his other side. The side of his crown was resting on the bottom edge of his pillow, making his neck ache. He knew he would have bed head. The morning sunlight tickled his eyelids, consequence of his forgetting to close the curtains around his bed.

Stretching his legs, he felt his feet hit something heavy toward the end of the bed, on top of the covers. Startled, he kicked it again. The mass grunted but did not move. Moony opened his eyes and sat up. He felt a sudden thrill that raced from his scalp to his extremities when he saw that it was Padfoot fast asleep at the end of his bed.

He looked as though he had simply collapsed onto the nearest comfortable surface and fallen right to sleep. About a third of his raven hair had come loose of its ponytail holder, making him look rather like a Muggle servant-girl after a long day of scrubbing with a washboard. Much of what was loose was spread across his face, and his mouth was opened slightly. It emitted a barely audible snore. Moony watched him for several minutes.

Padfoot's shoulder twitched suddenly, and his eyes opened blearily before hastily shutting again. Moony remembered his dream when he saw Padfoot's eyes for that brief instant. The thrill came back, this time settling in his wrists before fading. He wondered if Padfoot had seen him just then. Did he know that he was in his bed?

"Padfoot… Sirius? Are you awake?" Moony whispered. Padfoot grimaced and nodded, putting a hand to his forehead. Moony thought he heard him whisper "curtains," so he got out of the bed and pulled the curtains shut for his friend. This left him standing barefoot in the middle of the stone floor of a silent room. He got dressed and went down to the Common Room to see about his other friends.

CHUG

**Author's Note: **As you can see, this is a very early stage of his crush on Sirius. Isn't it sweet, though? Review or die!


	2. Discrepancies

**Author's Note: **So it seems I have decided to continue the story after all. I haven't finished the 3rd chapter, but I do have a premise written down, so it should be posted fairly soon. I don't know how long the story will be, but I think at least two or three chapters will be added... I'm not even sure how to end it yet. But things will get interesting. And by interesting, I mean awkward! Yay! (clears throat) Anyway, there have been about two weeks in the story between the prologue and this chapter. Please enjoy into clean hair from the roots up and review thoroughly! Repeat as needed.

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…Padfoot ran his fingers through Moony's ear-length hair, and rested his hand on the back of his neck. Moony looked up at his face, and Padfoot leaned down to kiss him in the musty darkness of the closet in which they were standing. Without knowing what he was doing Moony parted his lips. Padfoot, who knew exactly what he was doing, pulled Moony closer and sought his tongue. When they met under the roof of Moony's mouth, Moony gasped a bit. Padfoot moved his body forward, pushing Moony's back to the wall behind him. He wrapped his arms around Padfoot's torso, allowing his tongue to be guided out to the middle between their pressed lips. The closet expanded and became a room, still dark. Finally, the kiss ended, and Moony realized they were in the Shrieking Shack. He tried to run to the door before the full moon, but Padfoot held him in place. "Don't you want me, Remus?" he asked. Moony couldn't answer. He wrenched free of Padfoot's hold and fell forward onto the floor. He hadn't felt any of the signs this time; he began transforming completely without warning. The process was much quicker than usual. He howled. Padfoot stayed where he was, and Moony wondered with his last shred of sanity why he didn't turn into a dog as he ought to have. Good thing, though, since werewolves don't feed on dogs. Moony approached his prey and grabbed its arm. Using his other paw he tore at its throat. He threw the human onto the floor and pounced, ripping every limb that he could find. This was unprecedented. This…was satisfying. Prey that wasn't furniture, walls, or himself. Food. He howled again with bloody teeth…

"Oi, Remus! Wake up!" Someone was shaking his shoulder. "Wake up, mate!" someone was urging him in a hushed voice. Remus stopped thrashing, and the voice continued, "That was some kind of nightmare you were having there, Moony. I thought it best to wake you out of it." Remus let his eyes adjust to the darkness. It was Sirius.

His dim nighttime vision suddenly became much brighter with flashes from his dream replacing the boys' dormitory: Sirius looking down at him tenderly, Remus himself being pushed against the wall with an escalating heartbeat, the dark splotches on the floor, the overwhelming aroma of blood escaping Sirius's paling skin. Remus felt his stomach churn. The sight of Sirius now was too much. He was leaning over the edge of Remus's bed, his hair disheveled and his eyes concerned. Remus turned over onto his other side and did his best to pretend that he had fallen back asleep, even when Sirius tried to ask what was wrong. He stood there for another minute, and at long last gave up and returned to his own bed.

-

It was about 3 A.M. Sirius reentered the boys' dormitory after an emergency late-night trip to the toilet. Wiping the side of his face with a sleepy hand, he shut the door behind him as quietly as possible. He heard Remus moan in his sleep. Sirius smirked and wondered if Remus's dream self would be moaning too. Sirius stumbled over to his own four-poster already forgetting why he was even awake, but stopped in his tracks at a somewhat louder sound coming from Remus's bed, which was accompanied by a rustling of sheets.

It reminded him of the sound that a sleeping dog would make when it was trying to bark with its mouth closed at something in a dream. Except this sound was much more drawn-out and had a vague, inexplicable chill to it. He knew he had heard something like it before, but his brain hadn't woken up enough to remember exactly where.

Sirius crept over to Remus's bed and pulled a curtain aside. Remus was kicking and sweating and twisting. Sirius watched out of curiosity and wondered how he wasn't waking himself up with all that activity. It finally occurred to him that Remus was in the middle of a nightmare, and he started when Remus made another one of those eery sleep-sounds. He reached out and gave his thin shoulder a good shake. "Oi, Remus! Wake up! Wake up, mate!" He kept his voice reasonably low to keep from waking his other dormmates. Remus stilled. Relieved, Sirius said to him, "That was some kind of nightmare you were having there, Moony. I thought it best to wake you out of it."

Remus stared blankly up at him for several full seconds, but suddenly his eyes widened and lost focus. And then he blinked and turned away from him without a word. Sirius, thoroughly baffled by this point, wondered if he had done something wrong. "What's the matter?" Remus wouldn't answer.

Sirius tilted his head to the side. This wasn't the first time Remus had acted strangely toward him. It had started a few weeks earlier, when he began avoiding Sirius's eyes and dodging his touch. It was subtle, and he hadn't noticed immediately, so the behavior may have lasted longer. But Remus had never just ignored him completely like that. What could he have done to deserve it? He decided to talk to James about it.

CHUG

**Author's Note:** I like using Sirius's POV. I will probably do a bit more of that later. Hope you enjoyed reading him die again! Sorry about that. Sorta. Review now! Suggestions are welcome. They may just get the story posted faster.


	3. Grey Eyes

**Author's Note: **Man, I've been writing really fast for this story. I finished this chapter yesterday, and wrote two more chapters last night! Unfortunately, my monitor totally screwed up today, and I'm using a spare monitor and sitting on the floor with the on-screen keyboard clicking away. Well, anyway, nothing can keep me from my writing, so...yeah. I hope you enjoy this chapter! I'm getting tired of all the clicky noises, so I will leave you to it.

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The four Marauders walked into Professor Binns's classroom and sat down in their usual seats toward the back. Peter sat next to James, James sat next to Sirius, and Sirius sat next to Remus. Since Remus was the only one that had the patience to actually take notes on the lectures, Peter always fell promptly to sleep trusting that he could copy the notes later. Sirius and James simply passed notes, sometimes including Remus if they encountered a snag in their plans for a spectacular prank.

"Prongs, would you mind—"

"Sure thing, Wormtail." James cast a Cushioning Charm on one of Peter's textbooks. "There you go. Sweet dreams." Peter thanked him for performing the difficult spell and made himself comfortable. Amazingly, he had already started snoring by the time Professor Binns floated in through the blackboard to begin the lesson.

Remus took out a fresh roll of parchment from his bag, as well as a quill and some ink. He yawned. He hadn't had a very restful night, and it would have been a miracle if he could suffer through one of Binns's lectures and stay awake. He headed and dated the parchment at the top of that day's notes regardless, and began scribbling most of what Binns was saying; Professor Binns had wasted no time in beginning his oration.

Eventually, Remus looked down at what he had been writing, and saw that the last few lines were nothing but loops and squiggles. He squinted at his parchment, wondering how he hadn't noticed that. He put down his quill, rubbed his eyes, and then found that he had to resort to raising his eyebrows to hold up his eyelids. Clumsily putting away his notes and quill and ink, he decided to give in and follow Wormtail's suit. Sirius was facing almost entirely away from him, apparently absorbed in his written conversation with James. Remus wondered what had him so interested.

…Moony was leaning with his back to the trunk of the tree near the lake. He had been reading for a long time, even though there was presently no book in sight. Padfoot was hanging upside-down from one of the branches above him. "Padfoot," said Moony without looking up, "come down here." "Sure thing," answered Padfoot, who obediently climbed down to sit next to Moony. Without any preamble, Moony turned, pulled Padfoot closer, and kissed him forcefully. This time Padfoot opened his mouth first, and the kiss wasn't broken even when Padfoot pushed Moony's back onto the grass and lay weightlessly on top of him. They nimbly removed each other's ties and unbuttoned each other's shirts. When Moony's bite scar was exposed, Padfoot laid his hand gently upon it. Moony got up from under him and began transforming even faster than the last time. This time Padfoot looked frightened. He ran as fast as he could toward the castle, but Moony caught up with him and sunk his fangs into his right shoulder. Padfoot screamed but managed to escape…

"Come on, Moony. Class is over." Sirius prodded Remus's shoulderblade and stood up, crumpling the scap of parchment that he and James had been writing on. Remus didn't wake. Sirius put his hand on the top of Remus's head and moved it back and forth. Remus groaned at the discomfort and indignity of having his head shaken for him. Sirius smirked superficially and hoped that his friend would be too groggy to remember to behave strangely again. "Are you all right, mate?"

Remus looked up at him automatically, but instead of replying he blurted, "Sirius! I'm so sorry. How can I ever live with myself—" And then his eyes widened mysteriously again. Without another word he grabbed his bag and left Sirius alone in the classroom. Hopes dashed, Sirius left the classroom as well to catch up with James and Peter.

-

Several hours later in the Common Room, at James's suggestion, Sirius approached the armchair that Remus had claimed for his evening assigned-reading. Remus didn't look up from his book. Sirius had described Remus's behavior toward him to James, and while James had no idea as to an explanation for it, he did say that perhaps a friendly confrontation would help. It had worked in second year when they had figured out he was a werewolf, after all. And if that didn't work, they could use a Truth Potion, he joked. Apparently Sirius hadn't done a good job of conveying how worrisome the situation was.

"Remus. Look at me. I want to talk to you." The third-years playing Gobstones several feet away didn't look up, much to Sirius's relief.

Remus froze for a split-second, and then looked up at Sirius's ear. "About what, Padfoot?" he asked with such a convincing casualness that Sirius was almost taken aback. He had to remind himself that it was only an act. Remus wasn't even making eye contact. Why?

"All right… I don't really know how to bring this up tactfully. But you've hardly looked at me for at least two weeks. And it may be coincidence, but every time I reach out to pat you on the back or punch your arm, you move away." He didn't want Remus to know that he had been watching him sleep the previous night, so he left out the questions he had about his nightmares.

"I don't like when you punch me. It hurts." Perhaps for emphasis, Remus rubbed his upper left arm.

Refusing to be distracted, Sirius said, "You're still not looking me in the eyes."

-

"You're still not looking me in the eyes."

Remus sighed and forced himself to stare back into Sirius's intense grey eyes. "Well?" Remus asked. "Anything else?" That was a bit cold, he told himself. Why was he doing this? Wouldn't it make more sense to act normally, however difficult? Of course he would notice something was going on.

Sirius looked at him for several seconds, and suddenly dropped his tension and kneeled down next to one of the chair's arms. "Moony…" he began, "we've been friends a long time. You know you can tell me anything, right? A-and the others too, of course." Here he faltered, but continued as though hadn't. "But we're both canines, you and me. Got it?" Sirius then gave him his most charming conspiratorial smile, and it was not wasted. Remus almost lost himself in those stunning…beautiful…bright grey eyes. And the smile nearly made him forget everyone else in the room. Just as he had feared would happen.

Sirius blinked and let his smile fall, and then Remus remembered that he had left off with a question. What was it? …Oh, right. "…Got it." What kind of dreams would he be having after this?

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**Author's Note:** If you thought that was awkward, you have yet seen nothing! Reviews will tell me that someone wants to read more, so please leave a comment! I check my story stats more than my email... Kind of sad, actually.


	4. Somniloquy

**Author's Note:** It's been several days since my last update, and I have resigned myself to posting this story despite the pitiful amount of reviews I'm getting for it. Thank you, Wilfred Humbug, for actually reviewing for more than one chapter. I hope you enjoy this one. I'm at work on the next chapter, which won't be as awkward as this one or the one before, but it will be kinda weird. It will have one of Sirius's dreams! Yay! Chug it!

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It was about a week and a half later. Remus thanked all that was magical for a reasonably normal transformation that month. It was still blindingly painful, but calmed by the influence of his Animagi friends, he kept enough control to act as he did every month, with no special fixation on Sirius, violent or otherwise. Sirius was still confused about him, that he could tell, but of his theories Remus had no idea. It did not help that his dreams had grown more intense. Every night leading up to the full moon, he had almost the same dream. Immediately afterward, however, his dream self stopped attacking the dream Sirius. Remus supposed the nightmare aspect of the dreams had been a manifestation of his dread of the full moon. He hoped that was all. But the dreams continued still to grow more intense. He wasn't sure if he liked that or not.

-

The last embers in the fireplace faded to plain ash, and all was dark in the Gryffindor Common Room. James, who was in one of the cushy velvet armchairs, jerked his head up suddenly as he woke with a start. Where was everybody? He and the rest of the Marauders had stayed up late that night, since it was Friday, but apparently James was the only one who didn't go up to bed. They had left him there without waking him. Gits.

He stood up and stretched, crumpling his hair with one hand out of sheer habit. The sky outside the window showed no sign of dawn, so he figured he hadn't been abandoned for too long. He went up the stairs and into the boys' dormitory. Closing the door behind him, he heard Remus speak.

"Sirius…" The curtains around his bed were drawn.

"No, it's just Prongs coming in," answered James, suppressing a yawn. "You lot could have at least—"

"Sirius…"

"He's asleep. You want me to get him for you?"

"Sirius, yeah…"

Deciding that Remus was sleepy as well, James opened the curtain to Sirius's four-poster and pinched Sirius's nostrils shut. Sirius opened his mouth, snored once, and then thrashed suddenly, breathing hard. James let go with a smirk and said, "Moony's calling for you. I don't know what he wants."

"Huhwhat?" Sirius murmured, still catching his breath.

"Sirius…" Remus said again. It was more of a moan, actually, James realized. Sirius turned his head in that direction, and got up to go to Remus's bed. James followed him. James had noticed long ago that Sirius and Remus had something subtle in their friendship that Sirius and James had never had. Sirius and James could think on the same level, finish each other's sentences, and had even developed the same smirk for some situations. There was no doubt that they were the best of friends. But somehow, James thought, though only close friends, those two had something for which James was faintly jealous. But he would never admit it. It was not his to be had.

"Moony? What is it? Do you know how late it is?" His voice was still husky, but for Remus, it seemed, he was able to wake up quickly.

"Yeah, Sirius, Sirius! More…oh…oh…" James and Sirius froze. James, mouth agape, looked slowly over at Sirius. Sirius looked back at him. His eyes were almost completely round, and his jaw was hanging open as well. He blinked several times, and shook his head as though trying to dry it off. James watched as he pulled away Remus's curtain only a few inches and peeked inside.

"He's asleep?" James whispered.

"Yeah, he is." Sirius began to pull the curtain some more, but James came to his senses and stopped him.

"Let him sleep," James said. "It's obviously a good dream…about…you…" Sirius raised his eyebrows and made a small grimace. "We can't let him know that we know."

-

Sirius looked back at Remus's still-drawn curtain and then at James. "If you say so." He let his gaze fall to the floor between them, and then spring back up. "_This _is why he's been so mental lately, and only with me," he whispered. "He's in love with me!" The words didn't feel remotely English on his tongue. Where had he picked up this alien language?

"Well…how do we know this isn't just an odd dream? We are in puberty," James suggested weakly.

"No… This expains everything. I should have guessed something like this at some point. He's never had a girlfriend, come to think of it. Never showed any interest."

"But he's never had a boyfriend either," James pointed out. "And he's never showed any interest in that either."

Sirius sighed impatiently. James was just having trouble accepting it. "You don't call _that_ interest? And he may very well be the only gay bloke in this school. The chances of him having a boyfriend are even less than him having a girlfriend, especially if he's gay."

James shook his head and yawned. "Well, what are you going to do about it, Sirius?"

Sirius returned to his own bed. "No idea. I'm going back to bed. Thanks for waking me," he said in a flat voice, though he knew that sleep was now to him but a sweet ignorance that would not take him again that night.

"Sirius, please…harder…" Sirius turned onto his stomach and slammed his pillow over the back of his head, and held it in place for as long as he could hold his breath.

CHUG

**Author's Note: **Ooh, awkward. Will Sirius continue being a big loser about it? Or will he suddenly remember that he's somehow secretly gay and then go and make Remus's dream (in this chapter) come true? Post a review telling me what you think, and tune in to the next episode of Harry Potter and the Dramatic Teenage Situations! Coming soon. ...please review.


	5. Spug Snuffler

**Author's Note: **Mmkay, here is the next chapter. It's a bit later than I thought it would be, but I'm visiting my brother and sister-in-law in Colorado this week. Luckily my brother works for a computer repair company, so his house is well-stocked with lightning-fast internet! I'm hoping that when he replaces my crappy, diseased computer, I'll be more inclined to spend time on it, and therefore I may write a bit faster. Let's hope! Well, enjoy the chapter, and please review! I'm very happy with the number of reviews for the last chapter. Doumo arigatou yo!

CHUG

Remus sat down at his usual spot at the Gryffindor table and took two eggs' worth of scrambled eggs from a nearby platter onto his own plate. He then buttered two slices of toast and set them butter-side facing each other on his plate as well. A glass of pumpkin juice was already filled for him nearby. Everything smelled delicious; weekend breakfasts were always better at Hogwarts.

Sirius entered the Great Hall next, along with James. Sirius took his normal spot across and to the right of Remus, but James chose to sit next to Remus instead of Sirius. Sirius, who looked oddly worn out for having just got out of bed, cocked an eyebrow at James, who ignored it and began getting his own breakfast plate together. Remus looked up at the two but decided not to question it. Sirius hadn't tied his hair back before leaving the dormitory. Neither of them looked very happy. Were they fighting? No, Remus deduced, because if they were, there were plenty of seats for them to have sat in to be farther apart. They were childish like that. Luckily nothing so far had caused them to spend more than one meal at opposite ends of the table. Well, if they weren't fighting, then perhaps it was part of a prank. Shrugging mentally, he returned to his food.

A few minutes later, Remus heard a dull "thump" under the table. He looked up, and Sirius was grimacing in pain. James whispered to Sirius through clenched teeth, "Stop it."

"Stop what?" Remus asked curiously. James looked over. He looked tense, but quickly dropped into his usual ease of manner. His glasses were crooked, Remus noticed, and he appeared to have started buttoning up his shirt using the second buttonhole instead of the first. Oddly, however, his hair was a little neater than usual, perhaps because he simply hadn't been awake long enough to muss it up on purpose.

"Oh," James answered, "Padfoot wouldn't stop… playing footsie with me. He should know I'm not in the mood." He finished it off with a strained but still impish smirk.

Not wanting to take his reply at anything more than face value, Remus said, "Oh. …All right." He only had one slice of toast left and a few sips of pumpkin juice.

Remus ate the last of his toast, brushed the crumbs off his fingers onto his napkin, and picked up his pumpkin juice. In the middle of the final sip he happened to glance over at Sirius, who had yet to eat a thing.

Sirius was staring at him.

Remus finished the juice and set down the glass. Sirius was giving him a strangely blank look. He was thinking something, but was fighting hard not to let it show. Remus could tell by the slightly narrowed eyes. Thinking there might be food left on his face, he wiped the sides of his mouth. There was nothing.

"…What?" Remus asked, feeling his heart begin to speed up. He didn't like that look. It was so much the worse for those eyes to be so captivating, regardless of Sirius's mood. Remus found that he couldn't move if he wanted to.

Remus heard another small "thump" under the table, but Sirius showed no pain this time at being kicked.

"Nothing." Sirius looked away. The spell was broken.

-

…Padfoot and Moony entered Professor McGonagall's office. Padfoot noted with some disgust that the room was unusually unclean. McGonagall's large oak desk was obscured by great stacks of blotchy parchment, and between the stones of the walls there oozed a mysterious black slime. Neither Padfoot nor Moony dared touch anything. Professor McGonagall had stayed just outside her office, uttering something about keeping watch for Snivellus. Grateful for her vigilance, Padfoot turned to Moony. "Did you hear what Evans called Prongs the other day?" Padfoot asked. "A spug snuffler, yes, I heard. She's quite sharp to know what that is," answered Moony placidly. Padfoot spoke again. "Jenna told me she wants me back." He wasn't sure why he had said that, seeing as he had never known anyone named Jenna, let alone dated them. Moony seemed to understand, though. "She can't want you more than I do," he said. So he's jealous, Padfoot thought to himself. He pulled Moony into his arms, making sure to grab his bum, and kissed him full on the mouth. Moony parted his lips, and Padfoot followed, slipping his tongue inside. Moony moaned almost inaudibly, but Padfoot had the distinct impression that his own movements were mechanized, as though someone else had decided beforehand what he was to do. He ended the kiss. "That's all right," said Moony, as though he knew how Padfoot was feeling. "You don't have to be my boyfriend." Relieved, Padfoot clapped him on the back and said, "Great! Shall we fetch the others and nick some food from the kitchens?" Moony followed Padfoot out of the filthy office. McGonagall had left….

Sirius's sleeping figure was suddenly bathed in relatively blinding morning sunlight when James magically threw aside both of his heavy crimson curtains. He didn't wake, however, until James cast Levicorpus.

Sputtering confused curse words, Sirius twisted so that his chest faced the bed and tried to reach for his wand on the bedside table. James released the spell, and Sirius almost fell off the bed.

"—the hell, James, what was that for?" demanded Sirius. "I'm trying to sleep here!" He sat up into a reasonably dignified position on the edge of the bed, hair completely out of order, and squinted up at James. He ran a hand through his hair and found his ponytail holder next to his wand.

James, who was fully dressed, pocketed his own wand. "Everyone's just left for breakfast. I thought I'd warn you before I have to hex you every time I catch you glaring at Moony. It's not fair to treat him like that—he doesn't know that we know." James turned to leave.

Sirius put up his ponytail with undue wrath, ignoring the final snap of pain made by the ponytail holder. "Not my fault he's a poof," he muttered darkly.

There was a flash of light, and Sirius was dangling by his ankle again. He yelled wordlessly in anger and surprise. James was facing him with his wand out and his other hand on the door handle.

"And one other thing," James growled. "Moony was gay before we found out he was a werewolf. Stop acting like a baby just because it's you he fancies." He slammed the door behind him, not bothering to release Sirius.

-

Sirius struggled to reach his wand, his jaw clenched tight and his face slowly turning red. He swung himself closer to the bedside table, making a wild grab at the zenith of each swing. It took four swings, but he eventually retrieved his wand. _Finite incantatem_, he cast nonverbally, pointing up at his ankle. He crashed painfully onto the stone floor. He cursed at James, at Remus, and at Snivellus for good measure. What a mess. He decided he wasn't hungry enough to face them at breakfast.

CHUG

**Author's Note:** Ah, the drama. James is such a good friend, even if his methods are a bit brutal. For those of you (hopefully all of you) who have finished reading Deathly Hallows, I still think Remus is gay. And I still don't like Remus/Tonks. He feels guilty about Teddy because he was thinking of Sirius. That is my theory. He always says it's because he's a werewolf, but then again, he's been making up excuses all his life. Poor guy.

Please review! It's very easy! And delicious!


	6. Black Slime

**Author's Note: **Yay, longest chapter yet! This story is turning out much longer than I had expected... I'm thinking maybe three more chapters after this one. Well, this one doesn't have an actual dream in it, but it does have a flashback and a flashback to a dream. It should be pretty obvious when those come up. Enjoy and revew!

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James entered the Great Hall with his fists still tight and his heart still thumping with adrenaline. A few first-years and even some from fourth scurried out of his way as he approached the Gryffindor table. Smart lads, he thought. An angry Marauder is nothing to take lightly.

Remus had taken a book down to breakfast with him. James recognized it as the assigned reading for Transfiguration once he sat down in his usual spot directly across from Remus. Peter was sitting next to Remus, frantically working on an essay between mouthfuls of sausage. Though he wasn't hungry anymore, James buttered a muffin for himself anyway. When he was about to take his first bite, Remus looked up at him.

"Where's Sirius?" he asked. James noticed that he was beginning to look ill again.

"He told me to go on ahead," James lied easily. "Said he wasn't hungry."

"Is he all right? Is he sick?" asked Remus, a note of worry forming in his voice. James couldn't help but make a small smile at the irony of Remus caring so much for the welfare of someone who had just called him a "poof". He sighed, his anger beginning to drain.

"No," James answered. "No, I'm sure he'll come around pretty soon." He bit into one half of his muffin. He'd better come around, James thought to himself, chewing harshly.

-

Sirius got dressed and put on his cloak, as he knew it would be chilly outside, and stomped out of Gryffindor Tower, still cursing James.

He went down the marble steps into the Entrance Hall, passed the open doors to the Great Hall, and slipped out the front doors. Luckily the suits of armor standing guard made no move to stop him. Surely there was nothing wrong with a student taking a walk outside on a day when he had no classes. He mentally dared anyone to try and stop him.

The sky was steely grey with spots of blue in between the clouds. The sun was currently behind a cloud, so the grass appeared flat and dull and there was no glare on the lake. It was a bit warmer than Sirius had expected, though. He began his walk toward the lake. He reminisced.

-

_About two months earlier, when the Marauders were on the train to Hogsmeade Station in their own compartment, Remus was reading…predictably. Peter was watching James and Sirius banter about Quidditch and Lily Evans…also predictably. The compartment was littered with snack wrappers, as it was already dusk. _

_  
Eventually, there was a lull in the conversation. _

_  
James turned his head and looked out the window at the dark forest blurring past. Remus continued reading. Peter, with no one to watch, looked around nervously and then unwrapped a Cauldron Cake. Sirius, quickly becoming bored, turned his attention to Remus, who was sitting across from him, next to Peter._

_  
"Oi, Gorgeous," he said. "Whatcha readin'?" Remus flicked his eyes up to look at Sirius without moving his head, as though unsure that it was him being addressed. Sirius wondered how he had been able to focus on that musty old textbook at all. Once Remus seemed to decide that, yes, someone had just called him gorgeous, he lifted his head. _

_  
"Er…It's our Charms textbook." _

_  
Sirius leant forward and rested his elbows on his knees, his chin on his knuckles. "Now, what's a dashing young werewolf like you doing with all that book-learning? What say you and I go find an empty compartment somewhere, eh?" Sirius winked obscenely at him. Shameless flirting was always good entertainment, no matter who it may be with. Usually Peter was the victim, but Sirius was getting bored of the same revolted reaction, funny as it had been at first. _

_  
James looked away from the window. It was beginning to rain. "Leave poor Remus alone, Sirius. Can't you see you're embarrassing him?" he said, unable to stifle a laugh. Remus, though laughing himself now a bit, seemed more tense, and his ears were turning pink. Sirius decided it was a job well done, but his diversion had been pitifully brief. He sat up again, and leaned his head against the back of the seat. When would they arrive at the station?_

-

The sun peeked over the edge of a cloud, and made the grass and the lake suddenly shimmer. Sirius was much closer to the lake now, and the grass was becoming sparser, giving way to muddy beach. He stopped on one of the last patches of grass, and looked out over the lake. He thought he caught a glimpse of a giant tentacle at the edge of his vision. By the time he turned his head, however, there were only sparkling ripples on the water.

He had to admit it made sense. That hadn't been the only time he had flirted with Remus. He loved making the perfectly-controlled Prefect Remus Lupin go red in the face. Anyone attracted to blokes would eventually fancy a bloke that kept flirting with them, he reasoned. Especially if the bloke was Sirius. Sirius acknowledged that he was attractive, and he thought himself quite modest for hardly ever calling attention to the fact. But he never thought that Remus would be gay. A late starter, maybe, but not susceptible to his flirting. He had never asked. Why hadn't Remus told him? He would have stopped. Probably.

Sirius Summoned a flat, smooth stone from nearby and leaned back into position. With an abrupt flick of the wrist, the stone was released and it skipped almost a quarter of the way across the lake. The sun had been out for a few minutes now, and he was beginning to get uncomfortable in his cloak. He threw a few more Summoned stones across the water's surface, and then turned around and began to head back to the castle. His mood was decidedly better, no thanks to James's idea of "rise-and-shine," but he was still confused. Why hadn't Remus told him he was gay? And what was Sirius going to do about it, now that he knew Remus fancied _him_?

He would have to think of something. In the meantime, he would have to make sure to be extra-pleasant to Remus, regardless of how awkward it would feel. It would at least get James off his back.

Stopping suddenly, Sirius looked around, transformed into his dog shape, and then ran the rest of the way to the shadows of the castle. The wind flapped his ears and ran through his fur, liberating him. The outdoors was always so much more pleasant for an animal. He would have stayed out longer, but as a dog his appetite was much stronger, and he was suddenly starving. When he reached an area sufficiently out-of-sight near the front entrance, he reluctantly took his human form again.

The wooden front doors opened themselves for him when he reached them, with enough space to let him enter with his arms spread out. He entered the cool Entrance Hall and made his way to the Great Hall. James and the others were surely finished eating by now. Peter's Ancient Runes class would be starting in a few minutes. It was the only class that the rest of the Marauders had refused to take with him. Sirius was frankly surprised when Peter took it anyway.

Turning into the Great Hall, Sirius stopped abruptly when he nearly collided with Remus, who was leaving. James and Peter were behind him.

"Oh, there you are, Padfoot," said Remus warmly. "How are you feeling?" Sirius glanced over Remus's shoulder to look at James. James nodded pointedly, and Sirius understood. He had made an excuse for his absence, and he was expected to play along.

"Right as rain at the moment. Had a bit of a stomachache when I woke up." Sirius looked at James again for confirmation, and he received it in another nod. Peter looked back and forth between them, confused. Remus didn't notice. Instead he smiled and said,

"Well, don't forget—We have McGonagall in two hours. I noticed you haven't started your essay."_ …Black slime was oozing from the walls…_

Sirius rolled his eyes. "Yes, Professor!" _…"She can't want you more than I do." He pulled Moony into his arms, making sure to grab his bum, and kissed him full on the mouth… _Remus sighed good-naturedly, moving his book to his other arm to carry. _…Moony parted his lips, and Padfoot followed, slipping his tongue inside… _

"Er, I'd better go," Sirius said. "I'm getting pretty hungry. I'll catch you lot later." _…"It's all right. You don't have to be my boyfriend."… _

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**Author's Note:** Yay irony! On several levels, actually... Never mind. I hope youz folks enjoyed it, and review kudasai!


	7. Sweet Dreams

**Author's Note: **Hmm… Sorry about the long wait. I really just finished writing it last night. Had some writer's block at a couple points. Nothing really bad, though. Oh yeah, and I've started school again. But I like this chapter. Very introspective and stuff. "Stuff" being the operative word. And I'm sleepy right now. There will only be maybe one or two chapters after this one…finally. Well, anyway, enjoy! Best read slowly, this one. Sorry about the lack of detail, whatever-your-name-was. You have to admit it could be much worse.

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…Padfoot and Moony were standing in a large, ornately-decorated chamber. The carpet was green and filled with beautiful swirling designs, and there were several dark cherry writing tables throughout the candlelit chamber. Padfoot recognized their surroundings as the setting of an old painting in one of the corridors of Grimmauld Place. He and Moony, however, instead of wearing frilly 17th-century dress robes and drawing up Anti-Muggle laws, were wearing Muggle swimming trunks and chatting amiably. "Grueling essay tonight, eh, Padfoot?" "Nah, it was pretty easy," Padfoot answered. Moony looked him over, a sudden hunger in his eyes. Aware that he was shirtless, Padfoot said knowingly, "You want me." Moony didn't reply, but rather approached him and ran his hands sensuously over Padfoot's chest, keeping eye contact. Padfoot stepped closer and placed one hand on the small of Moony's back, and the other on the back of his head. They kissed. More forceful than loving, lips lost their shape as they were pressed together and forgotten in favor of tongues. The two boys ground against each other, moaning slightly into each others' mouths…

-

Sirius gasped as he sat up suddenly in his bed. He wiped his forehead and found his hand sweaty too. He felt a faint throbbing between his legs. With a frustrated sigh, he realized that it was still too early to get out of bed. So, doing his best to clear his head of the disturbing image that had haunted him once before, he calmed his heartbeat and tried to sleep again in the perfect darkness.

-

There was a small _thud_ as Remus closed his copy of Hogwarts, A History on his lap. He removed his reading glasses and pocketed them. Holding his thick, battered book under his right armpit, he stood up from his favorite reading chair and dodged the first-years sitting on the floor playing Exploding Snap as he approached the stairs to the boys' dormitory.

The staircase was dark this time of evening, as it was still too early for the torches to be lit, and too late to see without squinting. He felt his way using the ancient tapestry on one side of the wall. He made a mental note to ask Madam Pomfrey to check his nighttime vision. It was strange, really, that his human eyes were so mediocre when wolves' eyes had such—

The first-years' game exploded. The smell of sulphur met Remus's nostrils, and he wrinkled his nose. He was glad he had left the Common Room. When the explosion and all the accompanying complaints died down, he heard someone talking in the dormitory. It sounded like James.

"—don't know, but you're being a right git about it. Wouldn't you rather it be Moony than, say, Mulciber?"

Remus had just been about to open the door, but hearing his name, he stopped in surprise. Why was James comparing him to Mulciber?

Then Sirius's voice sounded through the door, low and menacing. Remus had to lean forward to hear. "If Mulciber ever started moaning my name in his sleep, I'd hex him so bad he wouldn't even be able to—" James interrupted him.

"Exactly. And you wouldn't hex Moony."

Remus's throat grew dry and his stomach instantly turned to ice as it turned upside-down. He nearly dropped his book. He hadn't been… Did they know? How could they know? …had he?

The conversation had stopped. At least, Remus couldn't hear anything over his own beating heart. He felt almost exactly the same as when he had been confronted in second year about his monthly absences. There was no doubt. They knew. Remus thought back to all the dreams he remembered about Sirius where he may have been moaning his name. There were only a few, but that didn't pin it down. He thought back to when Sirius had first showed any change in behavior. Yes. Breakfast. That blank stare. He must have told James, or perhaps James had told Sirius. Remus leaned his shoulder onto the tapestry beside him, numbly and desperately trying to sort out his thoughts.

There were unintelligible murmurs beyond the door. Remus didn't even try to listen. He clenched both of his fists tightly, making sure his fingernails were pressing painfully into the skin of his palms. _How _could he have let himself go so far? _Nothing _good was coming out of his attraction, and _nothing_, he was sure, could make things go back to the way they had been. From the sound of things, Sirius was not taking it well. At this point Remus's heart sank. He knew there was never any chance, but he hadn't expected such utter rejection. His friends had spoiled him with acceptance, he thought bitterly. His downfall. A brief image of Sirius appeared in his head, and he immediately pushed away the sinewy hips, the lustrous raven hair, the strong hands, the olive skin, and the ever-captivating grey stare.

He turned around. Maybe some butterbeer from the kitchens would melt his icy stomach. For the first time, he thought, he could put his Prefect status to some use, as it was just after curfew.

-

Sirius was sitting on the edge of his bed in his pyjama pants, staring at the floor between his knees. He was listening to Peter's and James's soft snores; it was around one in the morning, but he couldn't sleep. Or he _wouldn't_ sleep. Remus still hadn't returned to the dormitory. Sirius had trouble believing James's assumption that he had simply dozed off in the library. That's what he had told him, anyway.

The window was wide open as winter was late in coming, and a fresh breeze danced across his chest. His hair fluttered in front of his eyes. The stone floor was chilling his feet, but he welcomed the sensation, as it strengthened his resistance to the soporific glow of the moon.

The door opened. Sirius looked up to see Remus, clutching a thick, ratty textbook. Remus didn't appear to notice him right away, but rather he set the book down next to his own trunk and began undressing himself. Hoping to avoid another dream, Sirius stood up and approached him before he was finished unbuttoning his shirt.

"Where were you, Moony?" he asked quietly. Remus started at the voice and faced him. Was Remus blushing? Or…no, his eyes were red too. "Did you drink something?"

Remus's shoulders tensed and he blinked several times, suddenly staring at Sirius's feet. "I got thirsty," he mumbled. Then he said, more loudly, still looking down, "Shouldn't you be asleep? There's a match tomorrow. Ravenclaw. You should get your rest."

"He's got Peter to cheer him on," replied Sirius. "I didn't feel like sleeping."

At this, Remus turned away from him and continued removing his shirt and belt, growling just low enough for Sirius to hear, "Join the club."

Sirius tilted his head and then took an awkward step back. He had forgotten that he was shirtless. No wonder poor Remus didn't want to sleep, he thought to himself. It was the first time he had ever felt embarrassed for being attractive. Standing dumbly, he had nothing to do but watch his friend change into his pyjamas.

Scars were criss-crossed throughout his skin, concentrating on his sides and arms. The skin was pale at the best of times, but bare in the moonlight it was almost ghostly. His hair was just long enough in the back to cover the werewolf identification number at the top of his spine. He couldn't read all of the digits, but it was the first time he had noticed it at all. He had heard of werewolves being branded with numbers, but somehow he had never thought to ask about it. Then Remus lifted his arms to put on his night shirt. Sirius watched his shoulderblades shift under the tight skin and disappear under the dark plaid flannel. Remus bent down to remove his pants, and here Sirius simply looked at his own feet, next to which was the book that Remus had brought in. Hogwarts, A History. A fine drinking mate, for sure.

Remus stumbled while trying to put one leg into the pyjama pants, and nearly fell over. Sirius steadied him without thinking by grabbing his shoulder. Remus merely grunted and shook away to finish dressing himself. He turned his head to look over at Sirius, and asked flatly, "Why're you just standing there?"

"Er…" Sirius noticed how straight Remus's nose was when in sharp relief to the moon. And how much larger and sadder were his eyes. Were they not glaring at him, he might have been sucked into them. He still couldn't understand why he had been having those dreams, but right then, for just a moment, he didn't mind.

"G'night." Remus's curtains closed behind him when he crawled into bed.

"Sweet dreams," Sirius muttered in response. He yawned.

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**Author's Note:** Aww. Please tell me what you think!


	8. Snow

**Author's Note:** I know, I know… It's been forever. But now the school year's almost over, and I'll be graduating high school (yay!). But anyway, it's been a long ride for this story, when I only intended it to be a oneshot originally. I recommend, if you haven't read this in a while, that you go back at least one chapter first to catch up… Sorry about that! Been obsessing over Teppei Koike and learning Japanese, mostly… Please enjoy and review!

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James, Sirius, and Peter tip-toed into the dormitory, still breathing heavily from another full moon escapade at the Shrieking Shack. They had left Remus behind as usual to wait for Madame Pomfrey. While Peter slumped over to his bed, Sirius followed James.

"Prongs, I want to speak to you for a minute," he mumbled over Frank's snores. Peter was already beginning to snore as though he was in class.

James climbed into his four-poster and held the curtain aside for Sirius to enter the black cave. "Is it about Moony?" he asked, igniting his wand and doing the movements necessary for an unspoken Silencing Charm. The charm worked when Frank and Peter stopped snoring simultaneously. Sirius and James sat cross-legged facing each other a few feet apart.

"Yeah." Sirius looked down at his gently-lit hands and started to pick at one of his fingernails.

James saw the rarely-exhibited nervous habit and asked, "What's wrong?" He felt girly for asking it, but he knew Sirius wouldn't tell.

"It's just… I don't know. I've been so confused." Sirius stopped and ran the fingers of one hand along the top of his scalp, pulling the fringe away from his sweaty forehead only to let it fall back into place. "I've been thinking, though… You're going to think I'm really mad, but…" He took a deep breath. "What if I tried it?"

"Re—Tried what, exactly?" Sirius caught the sharp incredulity in James's voice, and chose not to answer. "You're saying you want to _try_ it, after calling him a poof and treating him like Kreacher? You _are_ mad!"

Sirius, having expected this, responded, "Well… Several nights ago, I—I talked to him. It was late, everyone else was asleep, and he seemed a little pissed, because he came in suddenly, staggering about and changing his clothes right in front of me. I didn't know what to do. I just stood there. And…I couldn't get myself angry at him. He was so…sad. I feel really bad for being such a great prat. He's my friend."

"Yeah, he is, but…" James shifted his legs so that one was stretched out past Sirius's knee, "…that doesn't mean you should try anything with him. He may fancy you, but just being his friend is enough, don't you think? Pretending you fancy him back is just wrong! It's cruel, considering we all know you're straight to boot!"

"About that," Sirius started weakly—

"He's been through enough just being a werewolf, and a gay one at that, and now you want to lead him on as some sort of back-handed apology? You're not just mad, you're sick!"

Sirius couldn't believe he was just sitting there and taking it. Feeling the familiar bile of anger beginning to boil in his stomach, he said in his most controlled voice, "I've had enough." He knew better than to get into a fight with his equally-muscular best mate.

Sirius hopped out of the bed and stole the Invisibility Cloak on his way out of the dormitory. He had a good feeling about Honeydukes'.

-

The corridor outside the Infirmary was considerably well-lit. There was a colossal window at one end, showing a beautiful cascade of snow accumulating on the grounds. The pure white light washed over everything inside. Sirius was sitting in one of several waiting-chairs near the window, across from the door. He was wearing his full robes, partly because of the cold, and partly to hide what he had brought with him. It was a miniscule chocolate rose, complete with leaves and thorns, charmed to melt only when placed in one's mouth. It was originally about twelve inches long, but he had Reduced it to fit in his pocket. It wasn't stolen, not exactly—he had left the exact change on top of a box of them in Honeydukes' cellar the previous night. It wasn't the first time he had "bought" things there after closing hour.

He did his best not to fiddle with the rose while he was waiting to be let in, as he knew his apprehension would soon crush it. He settled on the hem of his left sleeve. He could feel every breath pass through his windpipe as distinctly as he would feel wind on his face; his palms tingled with an uncomfortable cold sweat; he made the conscious effort to keep from second-guessing himself every time his fingers slipped clumsily on the heavy fabric of his sleeve.

Was he—yes, he was doing the right thing.

Sirius started at the sound of James's voice. "There you are! Don't do this, Padfoot." Sirius turned his head and saw James approaching, wearing a thin grey jumper with slacks, no robes.

"I've got to do something."

James stopped several feet from Sirius's chair and folded his arms. Whether it was from resolution or the cold, Sirius couldn't tell. "But not this," said James. "You're straight. You'd only break his heart!"

"Prongs, I'm—"

The door opened, and Madam Pomfrey walked out. "Not you too, Potter," she reprimanded. "It's bad enough I'm letting _one _of you two in to see poor Remus."

"But I—" James started.

"_One at a time, if you please_. He's awake now, Black," she said, turning to him. "Ten minutes."

"Madam Pomfrey!" James whined. Sirius rushed in past her, away from James.

-

Remus opened his eyes. Barely registering that it was morning, he let out a soft moan at the ceiling. He was completely numb, lying on his back in his usual bed. Before he even had time to recover his higher brain functions, Madam Pomfrey bustled over and felt his pulse and temperature. Apparently satisfied, she said:

"One of your friends has been waiting outside for you all morning. If you're up to it, you have ten minutes." He nodded weakly, thinking it might not be so bad to see James or Peter, as long as they didn't bring—

Sirius entered alone.

Remus felt his heart speed up until it began to pound. Had he not been numb all over, he might have bolted. Luckily, they hadn't made eye contact yet, so he stared out the window across the room as he sat up. It was snowing. He tried to let the swirling flecks cool his nerves. From the corner of his eye he saw Sirius reach his bed and sit in the wooden chair next to it. After half a minute of silence, he heard:

"He—hello, Moony."

Pretending to be unfazed, Remus allowed himself a sideways glance at this new, hesitant creature. Sirius wasn't even looking at him, but rather down at his hands. Remus finally turned his head out of sheer curiosity. Had he come to apologize? If so, was it really that difficult for him? Had he come to apologize for…what, exactly? For something Remus wasn't supposed to hear? Or had he come to reject him in person? His gut turned cold. Remus was never fond of complaining, but he had to admit that Sirius could have at least waited until he was out of the Hospital Wing. At the moment he had the strangest sensation that his heart only kept beating to remind him he was alive, pumping nothing but air. It did nothing to help.

If Sirius wanted to reject him to his face, he would have to do it later, Remus decided. He opened his mouth to send him away, but Sirius spoke first.

"Listen. Moony. I--I think I should tell you…"

"Stop." Remus took his chance to interrupt. It was difficult to form words with his face numb, but it still wasn't too late to put it off. "I know you know my secret now, and I know you're not pleased with it, but could you just, please, wait until I'm out before you start—"

"No! Moony," Sirius interrupted, clenching his fists and looking very white, "I came to tell you that I fancy you back!" Frantically, he shoved a hand into one of his pockets and pulled out something. He opened his hand, and Remus saw that it was a tiny chocolate rose resting on his shaking palm. Sirius held it out to him, as though desperate for some spell to come out of it.

…What?

Remus stared at the rose. He took it clumsily and set it on his lap. Sirius took out his wand.

"_Engorgio_," he muttered. The rose grew. "It's, er, supposed to be a normal-sized rose, you know. They just came in at Honeyduke's, and I, er, thought you would like it, thought it would be good for the occasion, you know, because it, er—" Sirius stopped and cleared his throat, to Remus's relief. There was another short pause, during which Remus tried to control his breath, and Sirius continued. "I do know your secret, and…for some time I wasn't pleased with it, I know. I was…a complete and total git, actually." He paused and stared directly into Remus's eyes. Then he took a deep breath. "I was in denial."

Remus tore himself away from Sirius's eyes, so brilliant with emotion, and instead focused on the snow. It looked very cold outside. His breath growing shakier, he thought to himself, why wasn't he happier to hear this? He'd been dreaming of moments like this for months. Was he dreaming now? What proof was there that Sirius was even telling the truth? Before he knew it the bottom half of his vision grew watery and there was a warm trail running down his cheek.

"Moony?" Remus blinked and shed another tear. "What's wrong?" Sirius asked. Remus didn't reply, as he didn't know what to say and was sure his voice would crack. "You do still fancy me, don't you?"

Surprised, Remus looked back at Sirius. Without meaning to, he locked eyes with him. How many times had he tried to _stop_ fancying Sirius? How many times had he resisted the urge to push the perfect raven hair out of his eyes? To grab his perfectly-toned torso and hold him tight? To tell someone, _anyone_, how he felt?

How many times had he forced himself not to—

Without warning Sirius leant forward and pressed his lips against Remus's. All Remus could cognize was that his lips had stopped being numb, and he hadn't even noticed until then.

When Sirius pulled back again, he looked expectant. "Well?" he asked quietly. "Was it everything you dreamt of?"

His face heating up, Remus looked down at the rose. "Better," he whispered. "Because it's real." He picked it up by the stem, and, almost in mockery, sniffed it. It smelled just as sweet as he'd expected. Setting it down again, he looked back at Sirius. "It was real, right?"

Sirius chuckled, returning to his usual self. "I should hope it was real," he said, "or else I've gone through a whole lot of rubbish for nothing just deciding to do it."

"Promise?"

Sirius stood up from his chair and wrapped his arms around Remus, resting his chin on his shoulder. "Of course, Moony." Remus sighed in relief and awkwardly put his arms around Sirius as well.

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**Author's Note: **Before you complain about the brevity of the ending, I must say in my defense that I ended it as soon as the conflict was resolved, as there would be nothing more to do to further the theme. I also love endings that just _stop_ right in the middle of something. Please tell me what you think—I'd love to see how my ending is received!


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